Funhouse Mirrors

>> 3.11.2010

Something I have always been jealous of: the people who can freely admit they love their body for what it is.  Every day I admire people who "rock it".  Ever since I can remember, I've always been able to find some sort of flaw even in my most favorite outfits.  While I think part of it comes from the crappy weather that winter brings, I think the other part comes from the over-achiever syndrome I suffer from.  Instead of accepting things as is, I always want to try and make it better.  Two years ago, I put myself on Weight Watchers and successfully went from a size 10 to a size 4.  Today I am still a size 4, but I find myself trying to loose even more weight.  I told myself that I would be happy if I could be fit, and the other day I ran 6 miles in under an hour- reasonably fit if you ask me.  Yet again, still not good enough.  I feel guilty after a day of not going to the gym.  I feel guilty about wearing something that shows my back fat ::shutter::.

Now,  I completely recognize how unhealthy this is for me, and am really convinced that I am going to try and do something to change it.  I think I may just need something I never really had- patience.

I am not sure how well this will work, but I'm thinking about finding one thing that I can say I really admire about myself each day.  And of course, it can't be the same thing every day.  To start, I am going to say I am glad my legs are cellulite free.  Of course I instinctively contradict myself and say well obviously, when you have thunder thighs the size of a third world country.  But I have to stop that part too.  So today, I am grateful that I am cellulite free.  What are you grateful for?

2 comments:

Kevin Homer March 11, 2010 at 3:11 PM  

I like your idea of one thing to be grateful for a day. I can help you come up with things to admire if you need it. No but seriously, awesome idea.

Abby March 11, 2010 at 8:38 PM  

Of course you can help me but that defeats the purpose. I have to see it before anyone else can!

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